Some Thoughts for Mother's Day
This is not quite what I usually blog about here, but let's just take a second to talk about how awesome Mothers are.
I mean, it's Mother's day, the day when most of us suddenly wax poetic about our mothers-- and when most mothers I've met feel guilty because they don't realize just how well they stand up in comparison with that praise.
I suppose insecurity is a normal part of being human-- I certainly deal with that myself-- but it seems like most of the women I know well that are mothers carry around a lot of guilt that they aren't as organized or as put together or as even-tempered as they feel like they should be.
So let me say this-- if you are raising a child or have done so in the past, you are amazing. Parenting is hard. Taking care of another person is hard. A happy, healthy child is a miracle-- even one in dirty clothes who managed to go to school and back before anyone noticed that their shoes were on the wrong feet. Even if you screamed at your kid twelve times today and you haven't even had breakfast yet. If you are a mother and you are reading this, chances are that you are doing so much better than you give yourself credit.
I think that goes double for parents of kids with disabilities. Don't get me wrong-- I wouldn't do what I do if I didn't love those kids and enjoy working with them. But raising a kid who has a behavior disorder or a cognitive impairment or chronic illness-- that's rough. It comes with a lot of challenges that other parents don't face, with sacrifices beyond the sacrifices that are a normal part of parenting. And yet, it's not some exceptional thing, some mountain to be climbed-- it's just everyday life. And that is truly incredible.
I am not a mother myself, though I would like to be someday. So everything I know about motherhood comes from watching other people. But I got a good start at that, because my first lessons in love and sacrifice came from watching my own mother.
I said in one of my first posts on this site that Aim High Music Therapy is currently a one-woman show. I think I need to apologize for that statement, because it couldn't be further from the truth. No, I don't have any employees or coworkers. But what I do have is a family that's been supporting me every step of the way, including my mother. Her support and advice have been one of the most valuable resources my company has.
My mom managed to raise three kids, each with somewhat unique disabilities, while running her own business and surviving chronic pain. I don't have the words to say how amazing she is. Both of my parents have made me who I am today and I am fortunate for it.
Aim High Music Therapy, in its humble infancy as a company though it may be, is the current high point in a journey that started back in highschool, when I came home from an enlightening class and started googling "music therapy". Or maybe it started a year before that, when my mother took me aside to explain exactly what the neurologist had to say about why I didn't seem to think or act like the other girls my age. Or maybe we should say the journey started when I was in fifth grade and heard a live orchestra for the first time, and it hit me down to my bones, and I went home announcing I was going to learn to play the cello. (It ended up being the violin, but that's a story for another time).
On the other hand, maybe the journey really started when a young couple, already acquainted with their fair share of grief, brought home a baby girl from the hospital. When that couple decided, consciously or not, that they would support that little girl in whatever she dreamed she could be.
Wherever my journey in becoming a music therapist started, my mother has supported me every step of the way. I would not, could not be here without her.
Mom, thank you. You're the reason any of what I'm doing now is possible, and I love you so much.
Everyone else: Happy Mother's Day from Aim High Music Therapy! If you have a mother, do something kind for her. If you are a mother--eat some chocolate or something, you deserve it. And to all of you; see you soon.